The art of slow

(Or: How I Stopped Inhaling Chocolate Like a Hoover & Learned to Actually Taste My Life)

Once upon a time, it felt like I was living life on a treadmill. My days were packed, my mind was noisy and my feet barely touched the ground. Constant deadlines, a never-ending to-do list and a schedule at full capacity.

Always in my head. Never in my body.
Always two steps ahead of reality.
Plotting, planning, pre-empting disasters like a neurotic chess grandmaster with a latte addiction.

You know the feeling?

You’re stirring the pasta while simultaneously thinking about your inbox, your thighs, the climate crisis and whether Fabiiyan’s passive-aggressive “per my last email” was a declaration of war.

Welcome to the mind.
Population: Chaos.

I was never in the moment.
I was never in my body.
I was a brain dragging a meat-suit behind it like a forgotten handbag.

Until one day... I met a piece of chocolate.
And my life changed.
(I know. Hang with me.)

Chocolate Zen and the Existential Snack

I went to this mindfulness seminar.
Because clearly, I needed something.
I mean, when you’re this stressed, even your hair starts meditating without you.

We were each given a fun-sized chocolate bar.
Which I assumed was code for “you’ll need twenty of these.”
Spoiler: you won’t.

Then the room went dark.
Not horror-movie dark. Meditation dark. Soft. Intentional. Like the universe had dimmed the lights so we could feel things.

And the instructor — lovely bloke with the calm energy of a tree that does yoga — said:

“Smell the chocolate.
Lick the chocolate.
Take a bite. Slowly.
Let it melt on your tongue like you’ve got nowhere to be and nothing to prove.”

Now, I’m used to eating chocolate like I’m rescuing it from a fire.
So this was… different.

It took 20 minutes to eat less than a third of a tiny bar.

And I kid you not — I didn’t want the rest.
I’d had enough.
I was satisfied.

Deep down to my soul.

Presence Isn’t Woo-Woo, It’s Power

Now before you roll your eyes and say,
“Oh great, another person selling inner peace through chocolate,”
let me just say — I used to think this stuff was complete crap too.

Like presence was some floaty, incense-scented concept invented by people with too much time and access to quinoa.

But presence — true, grounded, embodied presence — is not weak.
It’s not passive.
It’s not hippie fluff.

It’s power.
Raw, focused, available power.

Because when you are in the moment,
you’re not in regret about yesterday.
You’re not in panic about tomorrow.
You’re here — with your body, your choices, your fork, your chocolate.

The Real Problem With Fast Food? It’s Not the Calories

See, most of us don’t eat to nourish ourselves.
We eat to escape ourselves.

We eat because the moment we’re in — is uncomfortable.
Awkward.
Tiring.
Stressful.
Boring.

And food is a magic trick.
It makes us disappear.

Except — plot twist — we’re not gone.
We’re just numbed.
Temporarily.
And then the food runs out and the moment is still there —
Only now, we’re also uncomfortably full and mildly ashamed because we ate an entire packet of biscuits while pretending to scroll Instagram “just for five minutes”.

Emotions Are Visitors, Not Squatters

You ever notice no one gets stuck in joy?
No one’s walking around saying,

“I’ve been stuck in this bliss spiral for eight hours, please send help.”

But sadness? Boredom? Frustration?
We panic.
We resist.
We raid the fridge.

But here’s the deal: all feelings pass.
(Yes, even the mortifying ones involving voice memos and your ex.)

So what if — instead of eating to escape the moment —
you entered the moment?

What if — and stay with me here —
you actually slowed down?

🍓 The Delicious Revolution

Next time you feel that pull — the urge to eat, not because you’re hungry but because you’re human and life is weird — try this:

• PAUSE!

• Sit with the food.

• Notice it. Smell it. Don’t just snort it.

• Chew like you’re auditioning for a perfume ad.

• Taste like your life depends on it.

• Eat like you’re composing a love song to your tongue.

Because here’s the wild part:

When you actually experience your food —
you eat less.
You enjoy more.
You reconnect with your body.
And your body knows when it’s had enough.

(Yes, even if you’ve ignored it since the Spice Girls were together.)

🏄‍♀️ Want to Go Deeper? Surf the Urge.

If you want a hands-on way to stop emotional eating — not with rules or restrictions but by actually learning to ride the wave of an urge…

Check out my Urge Surfing app.
It’s not another calorie tracker.
It’s not about controlling yourself.
It’s about understanding yourself.

You learn to sit in the moment.
Feel the discomfort.
And let it pass — without a food-fuelled exit strategy.

You’ll eat less.
Enjoy more.
Live slower.
And feel bloody powerful doing it.

Want help slowing down?
Want food to feel joyful again — not chaotic or compulsive?

I’m here.
Forks down. Shoulders back. Let’s go deep.

And maybe — just maybe (like me) — you’ll find that slowing down isn’t a weakness.
It’s a superpower.

Dun Dun Dunnnnnn…..

Photo credit: unsplash