You Know What To Do But Can’t Seem To Do ItJul 03, 2021
Are you like most of my clients? You make the decision to lose weight. You know what to do. But you struggle to actually do it.
In this day and age, most people know what to do to lose weight. And lets face it, if you don’t, you can always google it! Problem is they can’t seem to follow through. Or they follow through for a while, but at some point it becomes all too hard and they stop.
So why is this?
Why, when wanting to achieve something incredibly important, that would change their experience of life for the better, like a slimmer, healthier body, do people struggle?
We think everything we do is driven by what we know. By common sense, reason and logic. But it’s not. Everything we do is driven by how we feel.
You want to lose weight because of how you think you will feel when you are slim – lighter, more comfortable when moving around, healthier, sexier. But then you grab take-away on the way home from work rather than cook. Or avoid going to the gym or going for a walk. You may eat chocolate, lollies or crisps when you’re trying to avoid those foods. Or you may procrastinate and act impulsively at times. All of these actions are not due to a lack of information, discipline, willpower or reason. They’re driven by how you feel or how you want to feel.
When it comes to losing weight, the ‘follow through’ is hard because you feel uncomfortable in the moment. And we don’t do uncomfortable. We eat instead. That’s what we do because eating feels good. It makes us feel better. Food numbs, dulls and quietens the discomfort.
So given that this type of behaviour won’t help you reach your weight loss goal, what can you do about it?
Become fully aware of what is happening in the moment….
Think back to the last time you overate. Do you know how you were feeling at the time?
Annoyed, frustrated, angry? Or you could have been excited, thrilled or over-joyed?
You see, we don’t always overeat to manage negative emotions. We eat to dull positive feelings too.
We use food as a distraction, for fun and comfort.
How aware are you of your feelings? Many of us are not fully aware of how we feel as we were taught as children to ignore them. Or we feel uncomfortable when it comes to feeling our emotions. We saw the adults around us struggling with their emotions and modelled their behaviour accordingly. We become expert at pushing our emotions away, distracting ourselves and using food (or alcohol or drugs or gambling or overspending) as a way to numb how we feel.
But humans are designed to feel emotions. The whole range of emotions. They’re a normal part of the human experience.
The way an emotion feels is different for every person but you’re often aware of the physical sensations such as:
– Butterflies in your stomach when you’re nervous
– A flushed, hot face when you’re embarrassed
– A pounding, heavy head when worried
Emotions are not scary and they don’t last forever. Many people either try to control their environment, which rarely works, or numb their emotions in order to feel better. But do this and you’ll be constantly be looking outside yourself to fix an ‘inside’ issue. It makes better sense to learn how to sit with an emotion, rather than covering up how you’re feeling with food.
Want to learn more and find out how to do this so you can feel more in charge around food and stop overeating for good?
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