​We live in a world where eating has turned into an obsession. Every day, we’re bombarded with endless dos and don’ts about food — what we “should” or “shouldn’t” eat.

But when did we decide that we don’t know how to eat on our own and need someone else to tell us? And pay them big bucks to do so?

The business of telling YOU what to eat is booming. Experts are lined up, each with a different take on what you “should” do. But here’s the kicker: they don’t really know! They can only share what worked for them based on their experience.

And scientists can only agree on two things: eat less processed food and eat more veggies.

So back to the question: when did we lose faith in our natural, instinctive ability to eat?

Here’s what I think happened: diets have totally messed with our heads.

The diet industry, a booming $80 billion industry, keeps us coming back by making us believe we can't trust ourselves with food. That we don't know how to eat. They’ve left us feeling confused, inadequate and obsessed.

Then along come governments and health professionals with their well-meaning advice, thinking simply telling someone what to eat will work. But kids rebel against being told what to do, so why do we think this approach will work for adults?

Eating is a learned behaviour, shaped by life experiences, often without us even realising it. Childhood habits stick with us — rewarding ourselves with chocolate, cleaning our plates, avoiding foods we dislike. Our brains cling to those preferences, influencing how we eat as adults.
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By the time we reach adulthood, we’ve had around 33,000 food experiences that shape our relationship with food. It’s not just how we were fed as kids; we also learn from family, friends, social media and even TV shows.

Many people think they’re biologically wired to crave junk food and feel powerless around it, but that’s not the whole story. Plenty of others manage to make balanced, healthy choices despite being surrounded by temptations. These “normal eaters” have held onto their natural instincts: they eat when they’re hungry, stop when they’re full and don’t feel guilty about enjoying an ice cream on a hot summer day.

They’ve mastered eating in a world full of food. It’s not about willpower — it’s about how they think about and relate to food.

Our desire to eat can be triggered by anything, like the sight of freshly baked cookies, which prompts a dopamine release that fuels the craving. Over time, this can become a habit.

Unlike animals, humans add emotions like guilt and shame into the mix. We don’t just eat because we’re hungry; we eat because we see food, because we feel uncomfortable emotions and because someone offers us something and we don’t want to be rude. We also eat because of rituals, culture and special occasions such as birthdays.

The way you eat now is a habit, shaped by years of experiences, influences and behaviours. Everything from the food you choose to your portion sizes reflects your past. These habits are often so automatic that we don’t realise they’re guiding our choices.

When we try to change, we focus too much on what we “should” be eating — obsessing over carbs, fat, protein or sugar. But it’s HOW we eat, how we approach food and think about it, that really matters.

To truly change, we need to relearn the basics: eat when we’re hungry, eat what our body wants and stop when we’ve had enough. This means reconnecting with our “inner wisdom” — tuning into how our body and mind feel in response to food.

While “outer wisdom” — nutrition facts and information — can guide us, we need to balance it with our personal needs and preferences. By combining inner and outer wisdom, we can make more informed, empowered choices. This approach frees us from the dieting cycle and if weight loss is a goal, it helps achieve that too.

Most importantly, it builds a confident, joyful and balanced relationship with food.

Want to know how to do this? Get in touch. I’d love to help.